Grieving the Losses That I Haven’t Grieved

I wait for the rain

Grieving the losses that I haven’t grieved

And the loss that is current.

Yes, I feel tired and alone

Longing for a soothing word,

The soft resting of one’s hand on my shoulder,

A kind smile directed towards a scared little boy

Longing for a dream.

A dream with a fool who visits him and says,

“What ails you, friend?”

And longing for a warm body to embrace.

Tonight I will sleep with the Indian dieties,

And icons who surround me,

And a beneficent Ganesha at my feet.

I pray that I’ll have the courage to receive their kindness,

Their protection,

And their help

So I can find my way back home.