The Kiss of February 16, 1979

Lights up. Camera. Action.

February 16, 1979. We kissed that night. 9:37ish. Suzy. Suzy Chapman. Friday night. Junior year. Our first kiss.

A 209–462–4994, she invites me over kiss.

A Catholic dress code, farm boy awkward kiss.

An I can’t stop thinking about you, lips smashing kiss.

A teeth hitting, what do I do with my tongue, this isn’t a movie kiss kiss.

A waterlogged with 1970’s soft rock love songs kiss.

A body mashing, again and again, standing on the deck overlooking the lake in Lincoln Village West kiss.

A frenching Kenna Garness after the Christmas formal, reddened and burning face, Dallas playing on channel 10 in the background kiss.

A flatlands and open evening sky, Central Valley farm, Stockton, California kiss.

A Fat City, American Graffiti, Cool Hand Luke Kiss.

A St. Anne, Teresa Van Rutin, Carole Mazzera kiss.

A Virgin Mary visitation in a dream, hormonal oceanic adoration of Sister Lorraine in 6th grade kiss.

A Debra Jo Fondren, September 1977 Playboy magazine, hiding the Playboys under my parent’s mattress kiss.

An eyes closed, all alone, what do I say, I’m missing the Rockford Files kiss.

A being laughed at for holding Margaret Urge’s hands on the bus in 8th grade kiss.

A sneaking off in the Chevy pickup, driving south on I-5 as the evening tule fog rolls in, laying my ass on the line kiss.

A first time ever I’m alone in a room with a girl, soon I am going to lie because I want to be with you, I don’t know why I have to lie kiss.

A saying what I’m not supposed to say, fuck you, breaking the family trance, pounding and roaring heart kiss.

A trembling body, not going any further than this, deep in it kiss.

An I can think of nothing else, you’re everything to me, I’ll never confess this to a priest kiss

A driving back to the farm working on my cover story kiss.

An I don’t care if I am sinning kiss.

An I’ll lie to my mom tomorrow, she’ll never get me to confess kiss.

A soon to get my heart broken, you’ll be out with Rick Verber in two weeks, Mickey’s Big Mouth kiss.

An I’ll be crushed. Doobie Brother’s “What a Fool Believes”, I’ll carry a torch for you kiss.

An I’ll still send you carnations on carnation day kiss.

A burning tears in the Chevy truck behind Macy’s, I don’t get it, what’s it about me kiss.

An I won’t stop thinking about you through graduation, will keep thinking about this night, this will be our only kiss kiss.

A you’ll go out with Tom Conlin after graduation, he’ll ask you to marry him, I will be asked to be his groomsman kiss.

A marriage will take place at St. Michael’s, I’ll be standing on the altar watching both of you walk down the aisle arm-in-arm, I’ll see him stumbling drunk kiss.

An I have a bad feeling about this, I won’t feel sorry for you kiss, I’ll learn what ambivalence means kiss.

An I’ll love again, I’ll forget you, I’ll be the glad fool again and often kiss.

But I won’t forget about this kiss kiss